Oh dear… I have become one of those mums. You know the type: they just don’t stop boasting about their children, pictures in hand, until their interlocutor’s eyes glaze over and you know they are thinking ‘I don’t ever want to become this boring, I am NEVER having kids!’
The thing is, I thought I had avoided this particular trapping until now. I have been blessed with a typical child who is meeting her milestones pretty much as expected so although I do pay some attention to other babies in that way I am not concerned for my own. Of course I like talking about her, but I think (I hope!) I have engaged with people about other subjects as well. Little Girl is 6 months old and hasn’t got any teeth, whereas most of the other babies in my antenatal group have got at least two, so what? She could still not have teeth in three months time and I think I would still not be bothered. She’s not quite rolling yet? Yep, not bothered. She is not remotely sleeping through the night, darn it, I have a BABY not a toy so again not bothered. Actually with this last one, maybe ‘a little’ bothered but I am still coping much better than I could have hoped for in the days when 8 hours’ sleep were a right, not an item on my prayer list. I am reminded of a sketch from Michael McIntyre about the difference between couples who don’t have children and those who do when it comes to sleep. Those who don’t, go to bed and tell each other: ‘Have a good night, dear’ and fully expect it to be the case. Those who do turn to each other and say curtly: ‘Good luck’. But I digress.
When people ask me how Little Girl is doing, I’ll say that she’s happy, not sleeping well at all and she has started doing this or that. All in all, a three-minute conversation. Until last week.
Last week, we started weaning and oh my goodness have I been talking about it ever since. You would think that keeping a blog and writing two posts about it in the same week we started would be enough, especially considering my slow rate of post production. But of course not! I swear, I am a woman possessed. I have pictures AND videos. I show them to every person that walks to the door. My friend who I see at least twice a week, who on Facebook has access to the full uncensored pictures of Little Girl’s prowess, was shown the same picture twice because I couldn’t remember I’d already seen her.
At the same time, how could I fail to be impressed? My little girl is eating (well, licking) melon! Avocado! Chicken! LAMB! She paints mash all over herself and still goes for more!
That’s it, I have truly lost it.
Have you found yourself doing and saying something you’d sworn never to do before you had a child?